Patrick: Mommy I have done my research and we need to talk. I have a bone to pick with you.
Me: Bone? You do know you're a cat, not a dog, right?
P: Don't try to distract me! I know what you've been doing and I don't like it.
Me: And what exactly have I been doing, my love?
P: You called me a hobbit and nobody likes hobbits and hobbits are weird and you called me a hobbit and I'm not weird.
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